Who do you think fares better overall in divorce, men or women?
by 
Sugar-licious a bellydancing rum maiden
ANSWERS: 19
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women, because they freak out for a while and move on. On the other hand, men do a slow burn forever.
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Hey Sugar... I think generally women do, as to settlements and custody. The one thing about statistics and averages is that they mean nothing to the individual. In my own divorce, although my ex made out pretty well as to property settlements. I feel that I have been able to progress better than she. She now has 7 kids, 4 different fathers. I pay no alimony, but 1,400.oo a month for child support for my 2 kids. Not complaining about that, they are my children and will always be more than happy to write that check, and she does a good job with it... She is now remarried, where as I have made the decision to not entertain the idea of marriage again until my kids are grown and on their own.. I know that people of both sexes can carry anger over divorce for a long time. I dealt with a situation that led to my divorce that on it's own was an exercise in letting anger go. Once I was able to do that, Life got incredibly better.
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My ex-wife got the kids and I did not have a say in it. So to me she faired better.
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That depends on who you ask. Most woman will suffer a significant loss in income. But I have seen situations where the woman remarries and continues with support and and the man is suffering financially.
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Females typically from I understand. I have not heard of a man getting alimony.
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I'll use my case as an example: I got to remain in the residence, got his 401k plan, kept all of the personal property, he had to pay 100% of the marital debt and legal fees, and pay alimony. I'm a woman, so I would have to say women do.
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Women do and in some cases deserve to come out on top because of the shit their husbands put them through, but there are those cases where the women stick it to the husband that doesn't deserve the treatment he has endured and never gets the good stuff that some other women get in their divorce.
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It appears to me and am not being sexist here, the majority of divorce cases ends with the woman being the better off. Very rarely have I heard of men faring better.
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I think a good indicator of how men v women would fare in court is evidenced by the Winkler murder case in TN. A woman shot her sleeping husband in the back with a shotgun and served virtually no jail time. She claimed abuse that was never corroborated by anyone. After serving a minimal prison term, her community bought her a car. It's really hard to believe. http://www.cnn.com/2006/LAW/08/15/winkler.bond/index.html
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Every single time it is the men who come out of it better than the women. I have never known of a woman who even walked away with half - never mind the lion's share.
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I think the person that fares better overall is the person who makes it work for themselves and their children. I think every answer is going to be different based on a person's priorities or perspective. My ex wife got a new girlfriend, 2 boys, the new vehicle and more child support/alimony than some folks' salaries. I got the truck with 480,000 miles on it, the run down trailer house with holes in the roof and floor we had just bought - and the piece of property it sits on. Since I regularly see the boys, I fared far better than she did.
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Women handle it better and learn to move on. Men who can't cope, usually try to kill themselves-dont' know why.
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women
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Usually women but my husband got everything, 4 vehicles with no license, all the marital assets. all kitchen and bedroom furnishings. I was an abused spouse and left him after he beat me up, I left with a suitcase and my guitar, is that a song or what. He never supported the household or helped me financially I got stuck with all the bills and his father kept all the marital assets in a storage space that I never had access to and I proved to the court that the vehicles he hid were at his friends garage. Now I have it in appeals court in New Hampshire, now lets see if the Supreme court and all the new JUDGES let him get away with this. Did I say I was raped by him for over 13 years! RE: NH Supreme court 2007- 0897 Keep watching for their decision.
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The In-Laws that hated your mate's guts.
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Whichever one wanted the divorce. The one who leaves always does better than the one left behind. That varies from situation to situation. Now, if the one who leaves screwed up and made a bad choice and comes crawling back, then the one who was left behind does much better! :)
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No one. It hurts everyone involved if they are normal people who began the marriage with love, or hopes of a good life together. Monetarily, men who make the higher wages will still end up with the larger slice of the money pie, but in any case, it is usually the children who suffer from the depressed income the most.
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there's no easy answer!!! often, the person who'd been trampled upon during the marriage signs everything over to the abuser, emitting deep sighs of relief!!! i think that, in general, women are better able to get on with it and make a new life. most laws in the states in the usa are now evenly split in giving balanced judgments to men or women. now, when it comes to custody, children used to be considered PROPERTY and PROPERTY belonged to men, up til women's suffrage. since then, the courts have adopted an attitude of "younger children need their mamma" - even if mamma's addicted to cocaine and in jail while husband is an episcopalian minister. things seem to be changing a little bit, judge by judge, in this regard ...
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I think we have to be very explicit about what we mean by "better", as there are several facets to this question. Better financially? My understanding is that, on average, men do better than women. Yes, men often get ordered to pay alimony/child support. But in many cases, it is less money than they were spending on their family during the marriage. Also, a large percentage of men (deadbeat dads) simply do not fulfill their obligations. Better in terms of child custody? There does seem to be some bias towards women. Some of it is warranted (women, on average, are more emotionally invested in their children than men). Some of it is simply prejudice (women are assumed to be the superior care-givers). Better emotionally? I think this is FAR too individual to assert that either gender does 'better' after a divorce. Some individuals barely break stride, others are emotionally devastated for years. Furthermore, the circumstances surrounding divorces are so varied that it is difficult to make any general comments in this area. . . .
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