ANSWERS: 45
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  • If you ask me, then yes, because not only do you expose yourself to a greater chance of contracting STDs and early pregnancy, but you are also showing irresponsibility and terrible disregard and disrespect for your own body.
  • in my opinion no it isnt. if you are in a relationship then i dont see a problem with it. its upto the individual person.
  • My parents are both strong christians and really spoke openly about sexuality, they always taught me to save myself. I do believe that if you can do it, and you have enough self control, then its beautiful when you meet the right one. The thing is the more you sleep around, personally, i think the less respect you gain from people and from yourself. Being a woman, i honestly can say its a huge part of who i am. It's intimate and i think people often forget its a gift to be able to have children and sex is supposed to be shared between two people who love each other and not some drunken night with a random person.
  • okay just a little edit, Is it truely terrible? no. But my own experience and my opinion is: If you wait... everything will be a little more special. You will have more trust in your marriage. and after you find your true love, You will really wish you could have gave it to him. Instead of looking back and wondering, Why did I give it up to someone that I didn't even Love?
  • I personally say no. I don't believe that one should wait until marriage, unless they want to. I did not and I don't regret it. I think one should be educated about what they are doing, and should care about the person they are giving their virginity to, and not just do it to do it. In this day and age, less and less people are getting married. And in no way do you HAVE to be married to have children. It just makes life alot better for everyone involved if there are two parents that are stable in the children's lives. Just be educated and do it for yourself, and I personally see no problems with it.
  • Hell NO!!! And people that do are just stupid.
  • It's not terrible. But it is something that most people come to regret later on. Especially if the relationship is not one headed for a long term commiment. And this comes from my own as well as several friends experiances. I think you should wait until you know for sure that this is someone you want forever with. And not just something you do because you think you're suppost too.
  • No. In fact I believe gaining sexual experience before marriage is quite important in order to be able to: a) Function within a marriage and understand the extra pressures that come with sexuality - such as emotional issues, I think that women often have a greater emotional impact from sex than men because they are the ones being 'invaded' and they are the ones who worry about becoming pregnant - this added pressure to the step of marriage, as well as the lack of knowledge about handling this, can lead to bad marriages, and ultimately divorce after 2 years. b) Pleasure your partner to the utmost of your ability. However many sex guides a virgin reads, they're still going to be awkward their first time. Yes, you can learn together, but if you haven't had outside input from other partners you're bound to be missing out on some forms of information that could keep your partner satisfied. c) To know what you are getting into when you do marry - do you really want to be stuck with someone who cannot satisfy your needs? - the try before you buy policy. So no, it's not terrible, in fact, I think it is a better idea to be a non-virgin than be a virgin upon your wedding night. Marrying a person without experiencing them fully, without living and sleeping together is foolish, because you really do not know whether the two of you can function as a unit together, nor know what conflicting emotions sex between you is going to bring up. If you haven't been with anyone else, you really don't know if you're missing out on something (which may cause you or your partner to stray if the relationship becomes strained), nor do you know all the techniques to pleasure your partner.
  • It could soley be a spiritual belief. If you haven't any spiritual beliefs, then it is a moral, health and/or emotional decision that is to be made by you and by you alone. Everyone on here can give you their opinions which is what you asked for, but no one can truly "answer" that question for you. I believe it is a deeply personal decision that you most definetly need to gather as much factual information that you can. Also, if you heard others experiences, that would also give you more insight on the good, the bad and the ugly that is involved with such a life changing event.
  • I hope not as you can't get married at 13 at least not in this country anyway!?
  • NO.more than 95% aren't virgins at the time of marriage but they lie about it.
  • NO!!! Do you buy shoes before trying them on? Do you buy a car without a test drive? Getting married is a lot more serious than shoes and cars... so why not see if you're compatible in all ways before jumping into matrimony!
  • well as soon as you have sex you are married to that person under god. but if you don't believe in god than you don't have any thing 2 worry about!BUT i must say if you don't believe then why the would you get married???
  • sometimes you have a choice and other times you don't
  • i think that yeah, it's wiser to wait until you're married. both for physical and mental health. (especially for women). sex isn't just a physical act... it's also an emotional one. i think that it's a beautiful thing when two people care enough about each other to remain faithful even before they're married to one another. that kind of umph and self control and love can trump any problems that may come up later on.
  • no not in my books. i did and i havent gotten struck by lightning yet hah;-)
  • yes. because the gift of your virginity is for your husband, or bride. if a girl has sex before marriage, its a false promise. that guy will walk away with something, that you will never get back and will be unavailable for your husband. who deserves it. yes. its terrible. its a faith thing. follow your heart not your head. because your head lies and your heart always knows.
  • NOOO IT IS NOT TRULY TERRIBLE!!!!!! Here's why: -It's not fair to the people who can't find their soul mate and want to experience that pleasure too. -You can have a great connection with someone you barely know and may never be able to connect sexually with the person you are married too. -If you waited until you are married, how would you know if you DO connect in bed? -Men have it easier than women do when it comes to orgasming. -Sex can be a beautiful and wonderful experience whether you are married or not. -The same guy that invented marriage said that sex was terrible. -It's not terrible for everything else on the planet. -People who refuse to question what they've learned apparently question nothing else. -I'm surprised so many answerbaggers think it's terrible. -MEN WANT power and control. and virgins. because many of them are selfish and greedy. (traditionally speaking). -WOMEN are beautiful and desirable. Why should their beauty be shared with only one person (who perhaps lured them into marriage). -Nothing truly makes sense.
  • Let's say you save yourself for marriage. You finally have sex and he has a little pecker. What if he's impotent? You're either going to leave him or cheat on him for the rest of your life!!!
  • i read yesterday that something like 96 percent of the american population is not or will not be a virgin by the time they get married. it's kind of like sex is a recreational sport these days. which is not to say that people should just sleep with whoever, willy nilly.. but honestly, it just isn't as big of a deal as people seem to think it is.. like..if you're the kind of person who thinks that it's this magical, amazing thing to be shared by two people whose hearts beat as one and all that, then cool.. you know. whatever.. but if you're not that kind of person, and you honestly just think that sex is a nice thing to do with someone who you like/are attracted to.. as long as you're careful and cognizant of the other person's feelings/intent/status/etc... then that's fine too. no one should be made to feel bad because of a choice that they make for themselves and their own bodies. i think that people who have been told all of their lives that they're bad people unless they wait until marriage are too quick to judge people who just don't buy into stuff like that. i know for a fact that my future husband will not give a rats ass that he wasn't my first... because it is physically impossible for me to be attracted to someone who puts so much stock in something like the satus of someone else's virginity.
  • Of course not. Why would something that is the method by which procreate so mankind does not die out, be terrible? Nothing happens when you lose it you know. You remain the same person the day afterwards as you were the day before. You do not have sign attached to the back of your head singleling you out as tarnished and soiled. Don't be led to believe that if you do, then no man will ever look at you. That's just plain silly. It's 2007 not 1404. Just in case I am right in thinking that you may have lost yours, let me clarify: You are not a slut, tart, cheap or dirty - or a whore. You are not going to be sent to spend eternity in the hell fires and you have NOTHING, ABSOLUTLEY NOTHING AT ALL to be ashamed of. You have not let anybody down whatever they say, whom ever they are. Do not attach a label to yourself, ever and don't believe those that tell you otherwise, remember this if nothing else. You have behaved in a normal and accepted way just like the rest of us. So, no, it's not terrible at all. It's normal.
  • I suspect virginity is more a state of mind than a physical condition. But whatever you consider it, there seem to be many differences in how it is considered. The idea of "saving" yourself for "the one" sounds nice. Frankly, I would be afraid to get married without having sex first. If I intend to spend a substantial part of my life with a partner, I want to know everything I can about that partner before I make a commitment. I would want to travel with the prospect, spend close and intimate time as well as public time together. I want to know as much about the other as I can learn and I want the other to understand me as fully as possible. To me, all of this learning and knowing involves a total package, not just a partial post.
  • There's a thing called sexual incompatability. Sometimes two people just don't click sexually. Are you really willing to wait till you're married to find that out? I'm sorry but I wouldn't buy a car w/o test driving it!
  • To me, no. It all depends on you. If it's in your religion, then you should wait, but if it is completely your decision, do what you think is best and don't let anyone else tell you what to do.
  • No. As someone who was a virgin when they got married and married a virgin... it would have been a lot more simple and a lot less confusing later if we had. Mind you, it never pays to be unsafe and a slut about it, but a little here and there, no biggie. As far as the religious ramifications, you should consider that it is more of a cultural addition to religion that a religious addition to culture.
  • Yes. Plain and simple. Sex is meant for marriage, period end of story, no ifs, ands, ors, or buts.
  • It depends on you and how you personally feel about it and your religion and culture. Waiting till you are married was designed before birth control. There weren't any good ways to prevent pregnancy so it was best to wait till you were married and would have a husband to support the child. Women couldn't work or couldn't get jobs that paid enuf to support themselves and a child. There was also a lot of shame for the woman that became pregnant and wasn't married and the child was treated badly too. This wasn't that long ago actually.
  • No. It's not a sin. It's natural. Marriage isn't natural. I don't see dogs getting married. Or is someone going to argue with me and say something like "but that's what separates us from animals". No, marriage isn't what separates us, it's intelligence. Something one lacks when getting married.
  • I think its nice to wait but I dont judge those who dont because i didnt.
  • No. The emphasis on virginity prior to marriage is a leftover from extreme patriarchy and was not applied to men in any meaningful way. It is about sole ownership of a female's body, probably with a beginning in a desire to ensure paternity of children. We are a sexually reproducing species and we all have sex drives. Whatever happens between two mutually consenting adults (or two mutually consenting teenagers of the same approximate age) is never terrible. Just be responsible in regards to your reproductive and emotional health. If it is going to harm you (even to make you feel badly about yourself), don't do it.
  • No, of course it's not truly terrible, but I wish I had waited.
  • No, absolutely not. You just have to feel that it's right. And you have to be old enough and responsible enough to make sure you don't end up with a baby - or an STD - or both.
  • No, I don't think it is. It more or less depends on how you want to see it though. If you want to wait until you're married, then wait and don't let anyone pressure or change your point of view. If you're just waiting for that one guy who you feel comfortable enough with, then wait for that. But it's your choice and dont let anyone else tell you that you're a terrible person for losing it before you get married.
  • Hell no.. get rid of it.. virginity is a burden best left behind. Have good sex, lots of sex, with lots of men. When you do get married, your sex life will be better. I can not imagine how bad a wedding night would be with two virgins..
  • Yes. It is a sin. God will not reprieve you. Sorry... Had to get that out of my system. No. It's not terrible. It's very common, and it teaches you... Not having sex before marriage used to be against the law. If you didn't have that spot of red on the sheets in the morning after the wedding, a lot of marriages were annulled. Now? Most people don't get married. If they do they're not together for very long. It all depends on your personal preference. You shouldn't think of virginity as a burden, but as a gift. Something you can only give to one person. It's special. I know a lot of people who still think about the person they lost it to. And that was 20+ years ago. And they're happily single and/or married.
  • no not at all, you gotta know what your getting yourself into before you decide to marry to it =]
  • eys its truly terrible hoe will u feel if ur partner fucks some one in front of ur eyes.......... if u think u can see him like this than u can do it before marriage and if u think u cant then u also cant do that. me personally not able to lose it with some one else.......
  • No! not at all, now-a-dayz everyone is loosing their virginity before their married...so ur not the only one and its not terrible! I dont think you would go to hell bcuz u lost ur virginity before marriage..
  • nope, not at all
  • yes, you will surely go to hell and lucifer will rip your womb out with his mighty mighty pork sword of doom
  • I really don't see it is, but if thats something that is in your religion, or your character tells you thats wrong, then i guess it could be "terrible"
  • no . Sex is way more important to a relationship than people think. I f you get with someone who isn't pleasing you it can make and create a very closed sexuality or the lack of enjoyment of sex. I hated the sex with the guy i lost my virginity too. I thought all sex was bad and had no desire to do it. we dated for 4 years and he broke up with me because i refused to do it in the last 2 years completely, i told him we don't need to do that! Then my next relationship the sex was amazing and i was like wow, now what would a marriage to my first have been like for both of us? Wewould have been so misarable ruining each others lifes.
  • yes it is because people might have unprotected sex and the girl might get pregnant and the point of being married means those two people are willing to be commited to each other and without being married, you won't have much luck with that boy/man. You have to have hope that he won't leave you with that baby. And if you dont get pregnant, still that boy will probably be using you for sex. They play it off so damn good sometimes you cant even tell when he's lying or telling the truth.
  • No, love-making is a natural and interesting part of life. When you get married, the person should love you for you. I'm not a virgin anymore and I don't think that means that I can't find a man that I love and that loves me back. Besides, those guys that really want their women to be virgins are either all hung up on primitive religious traditions or are really power hungry. I wouldn't want a guy that is desperate for someone that is "pure" and "innocent". Those types are just plain male-domineering jerks.
  • No, it's not. I did it. (And I'm somewhat known as a Christian singer and actress.)

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