If a man proposes to a woman and doesn't set a date for the wedding, is that a sign that he's not that committed to marrying her? Who is responsible for naming a date? (This is just a hypothetical question)
by 
lonelydragon
ANSWERS: 18
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You both need to get together and decide when you would like to, mainly the girl. If she wants a winter wonderland wedding, or a spring wedding, and the same goes for the location.
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I have never heard of anyone proposing marriage and naming the day. I thought that was something the couple discussed and decided.
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No, not really. I think it would be weird if a man proposed to me and said "Will you marry me? Good... now what date should we get married? What time?" The individuals involved can sit down after the fact, and discuss when they want to marry, the man doesn't have to set the date as he proposes.
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I don't think it's a sign, but I think it is the responsibility of both of you to contribute to how long you wish to be engaged and if not find a date to marry, find a date to discuss the date. I know some couples prefer to be engaged for a few years. Where as some wish to be married immediately. The only way you will find out what's best for your relationship is to figure it out together.
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I would think when to marry is one of the decisions a couple should make together.
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No. If he proposed, without pressure, that shows commitment on his part. The date is a detail yet to be decided on.
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The couple should probably decide a time frame within 6 months to a year after the initial engagement.
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On the spot? Doesn't mean anything. But if he keeps putting off setting a date, I'd call that a red flag. Both people are responsible for naming a date. It's not exclusive to one person or the other.
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they should enjoy their engagement a couple of weeks. then whoever is most eager should bring it up and both parties decide together. there are not clear cut rules on who brings up the date. i would worry about a couple that could not talk freely about any subject without worrying who should speak first, that would make me nervous. +5
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It has to be a time when both want it, which can only be determined through discussion. Some things may want to be avoided (hot July weddings, when sweat stains and running makeup can ruin pictures, or dead of winter in areas where ice storms are likely). For some men, it could be that they are afraid of the pending commitment, and will shy away at the mention of it. There are a myriad of reasons the gentleman doesn't broach the subject. We wouldn't know until he talked about it. But if it has to be pulled out of him like a wisdom tooth, that would be a major red flag for me. Some WOMEN say "screw it" to the whole thing! This is what I did. My husband is wonderful, but he couldnt make a decision to reach for the garden hose if he was on fire. I prompted, we set the date, and we went....10 years ago :) +5
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Red flags now?
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In my world the woman sets the date, not the man. Because most guys don't care one way or the other and they leave it up to their fiance to figure out which day would be best for all... And that can get very complicated if they both have careers to juggle. Couple that with the zillions of details if the wedding is going to be large. Some places are booked a year in advance for weddings. You have to decide what kind of wedding..get input from both sides of the family. Figure out what time of year your loved ones can most easily attend. It is eventually jointly agreed to but I think the lady is the Driver usually! :)
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this is a bit vague. When he proposes, it is normal for it to take a little while to figure out the perfect date. How to pay for it, when, where, etc. HOWEVER, if he proposed 6 yrs ago and a date has not yet been set, I would venture to say the proposal was a manipulation tactic to keep her on her leash. If my memory serves me, i think it was about a month after he proposed that we actually set THE DATE!
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I thought they were supposed to have a conversation about it, just in case one of them can't make it that day.
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Both people are responsible. If a man proposes and says they are getting married on a specific date, the woman, generally speaking, wouldn't be very happy. The women are often the ones who set the date, since it is considered "their day", however, it is best to discuss and decide together since both people and their families are affected by the date choice.
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If given the opportunity I'd take my S/O's hand look into his eyes and tell him "I Love you and want to spend the rest of my life with you. You complete me in every way, Will you marry me?" : ) : ) A civil wedding on October 3rd 2009. And he Said...................
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I sense fear on somebody's part here. I asked my wife and we set a date the very next day. We found a calendar and finally settled on the most magic day of our lives, Oct. 11th. If he is holding back, there is a reason and its up to you to discover what it is. Most couples can't wait and your situation bothers me. John
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You don't have to set a date at the same moment of the proposal but in the next week you should be talking about a timeframe or setting the actual date. I have plenty of friends who have been engage for over five years which does'nt make any sense to me.
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