If a friend promises to call and doesn't, how can I politely let them know I'm offended?
by 
AhMeD_2_3
ANSWERS: 20
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The next time you see them, just casually ask like "Hey, how come you didnt call last night?" and see if they have a good excuse. If they are a good friend they wont mind you asking and either way, they should apologise for not calling.
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Always assume it was unintentional. Try saying "I was worried when you didn't call last night, is everything okay?" Usually the answer will be something along the lines of "Oh, darn! I knew there was something I forgot last night. I'm so sorry." Try not to think the worst of someone. If they are your friend I'm sure they wouldn't intentionally upset you. They may also have had to unexpectedly go to the hospital for a family member, for example. And calling you became less important than the health of a loved one. Always assume they have good intentions.
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Letting the person know you are offended is half the battle. You might also get the person to change their behavior. I have noticed that women skillfully use humor or good natured teasing to gently scold a person for being inconsiderate. Someone who lacks this gift might say "You promised to call me. Did you forget?" If the person gives a lame excuse, say "I'm not getting on your case but I need you to call me when you promise to." Say it with a smile, not in a reproachful tone. It may be useful to examine why you are offended. A promise to call is similar to "let's do lunch sometime." The person may or may not be sincere. Someone who promises to call and then doesn't may not be an actual friend. You shouldn't rush to judgment, however. A person who is in some ways inconsiderate might turn out to be a good friend if you let the friendship develop. Cracking down on people who don't meet your expectations is not conducive to building friendships.
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Okay, heres the plan. the next time you see them, ensure your hair looks bedraggled, rub onions under your eyes to make them water, and generally try to appear as though youve fallen out of a tree, hit every branch on the way down, landed in a pond and chased a few parked cars. they are bound to enquire "how are you? you look a little... tired" try not to make them feel bad, subtley reply, "you broke your promise, forgot to call me and i am extremely offended". with any luck, they will never break their promise again. (either that or they will gradually cut all ties with you, but hey! at least you let them know how you felt! chin up!)
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I am a person who forgets to call people back. I have a friend who gets very offended at this. She is not the only person I forget to call back, but she must think that my lack of calling is due to some malicious agenda or being purposefully rude. She tried the "teasing" approach, and I must say, she wasn't satisfied with my honest confession that I am not a phone person and I forget/get too busy to call people back when they just want to talk (ie, not a specific reason for calling, like to get information). She ended up causing a very emotional confrontation which has led to distance in our relationship. My advice is, gauge the level of your offense. Are you mildly irritated? Let them know that you missed their call, wished they had called you. Are you terribly hurt that they didn't call? You need to express to them right away that you are someone who takes very seriously matters of the telephone and that it bothered you when they promised to phone but didn't. It will make your relationship easier and happier if you are as upfront about this as possible.
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How do you know they won't call tomorrow?... Your own fault for feeling offended..... for being attached to something you have no control over.
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probably by not calling them back, they will get the message
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You don't have to let them know you're offended. They're clueless. You could always say I thought you were going to call me yesterday what happened
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Sometimes people just walk through their door and their attention is taken up by something else, that's just life. You could just phone and say "Are you ok, just that you said you'd call yesterday and you didn't? Text it if you want, and see what response you get. I'm a ring them type of person, I cannot flaff about :)
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Let me guess someone of the opposite sex. Well R2D2 its a little tough to tell your gender but maybe that was the point. Not that you're still floating around AB with that ancient question. Either AB has started rotating questions from the past again or someone dug this up. I'm thankful, at least they are new to me! *************I'd say this is nothing to be offended over, except that they lied. Provided you didn't coerce them into saying they'd call, there was no reason for them to even make a promise to begin with. There are many phrases one could use like talk to you later or I'll call you... But when they say they will call and you clear time from your schedule to talk with them they should keep their word. To me the call doesn't matter nearly as much as their honesty. I probably wouldn't be polite about it. I'd tell them flat out "I don't care if you call or not but please don't lie to me again."
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"I was looking forward to your call that never came. Why did you say you'd call and then not?"
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Next time they say they will call just say in a very sarcastic tone "sure you will".
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If it's a real friend, you don't have to worry about being impolite. And maybe you don't know the circumstances behind this person not calling.
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Politely tell them you will call them about it. Then forget.
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just tell them you were waiting for their call..and if they do it in the future,well ya know they are not really caring much for you
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If you are good friends just casually bring it up. There may be a simple explanation. Don’t necessarily take it personally either. They may have just forgot. It happens, we are all human. If it keeps on happening that’s another story.
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There's no way to do that "politely". Either you want to communicate offense or you want to be polite. You can't do both. So, the best thing to do is say, "Are you OK? When you didn't call last night I was worried." This let's the person know that she screwed up without being offensively offended.
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Go and egg his house.
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Did I miss your call?
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If you get offended over such a minor issue, it's time to re-evaluate your priorities.
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