Is it out of the question for a 17 year old to be interested in or fall in love with a 23 year old?
by 
BenjiB
ANSWERS: 32
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It is not out of the question, but it is illegal. In the US. Plus remember, a guy is a guy in the US or in Europe or in Canada.
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Absolutely not, although sexual relations (even if completely consensual) would be illegal until the 17-year-old turns 18. There is nothing "wrong" with this. I will, however, repeat some cautionary words from my answer to a similar question. Age 18-21 is a period of incredible change and growth, intellectually and emotionally (take it from me-- I recently turned 22 and am definitely not the person I was at 17!). The 17-year-old, no matter how mature they may already be, is going to grow and change, which could mean growing further apart from someone that the "old" self had fallen in love with. The 23-year-old needs to be patient and flexible during this process. The two can certainly be in love and in a relationship, but they should take the time to make sure it's exactly what both of them will want in their adult lives. Furthermore, if the 23-year-old returns the 17-year-old's feelings, make sure that it's not because said 23-year-old is still a little immature and identifies better with younger people. This scenario would bring the risk of the 17-year-old outgrowing the 23-year-old in a few years.
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A 17 year old should be dating some one closer to their own age and maturity level, like a highschool friend. Some one who shares the same interests and concerns, like homework, chores, etc. A 23 year old should be too, like someone else who is out of highschool, is in the process of or has established a career and is more close to being ready to start settling down. If the 23 year old isn't on the road to a career and settling down yet, then they are probably kind of immature for their age, and the 17 year old will probably out grow the relationship shortly. Once the 17 year old finishes up highschool and enters the real world, they are going to find out that there are so many options that they need to explore and by then, the 23 year old should know what they want to do, or at least have a pretty good idea. Once people get to around 30-40, they start to be more on the same wave length and the age difference isn't such a big deal, but I don't think that you should date someone more than 2-3 years older than you until you reach at least around 25 or so and have established a life for yourself.
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hahaha...thats funny, I have this same problem
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I feel it is really a case sensitive question. Everyone is brought up differently, everyone matures at their own pace. I know 17 year olds far more mature and sophisticated than some 25 year olds - granted this may not be the norm, but neither is this scenario of age in a relationship. What I'm getting at is maybe there's something to a 23 year old dating a 17 year old, it's probably something noth never imagined they would go for, but because of the (hopefully) incredible connection and commonalities and overall enjoyment of each others company it makes all the sense in the world. Some 17 year olds have full time jobs, work ethics and are even done w/ high school. My first boyfriend was 15 and a Freshmen in High School, at the time I was 17 and a Senior. We both had enough self esteem to let go of any of the initial gossip by our peers, and after a while together our friends understood us and really respected our relationship. Six years later we are still very very close and if we were living in the same state we would probably be dating.
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I feel it is really a case sensitive question. Everyone is brought up differently, everyone matures at their own pace. I know 17 year olds far more mature and sophisticated than some 25 year olds - granted this may not be the norm, but neither is this scenario of age in a relationship. What I'm getting at is maybe there's something to a 23 year old dating a 17 year old, it's probably something noth never imagined they would go for, but because of the (hopefully) incredible connection and commonalities and overall enjoyment of each others company it makes all the sense in the world. Some 17 year olds have full time jobs, work ethics and are even done w/ high school. My first boyfriend was 15 and a Freshmen in High School, at the time I was 17 and a Senior. We both had enough self esteem to let go of any of the initial gossip by our peers, and after a while together our friends understood us and really respected our relationship. Six years later we are still very very close and if we were living in the same state we would probably be dating.
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I feel it is really a case sensitive question. Everyone is brought up differently, everyone matures at their own pace. I know 17 year olds far more mature and sophisticated than some 25 year olds - granted this may not be the norm, but neither is this scenario of age in a relationship. What I'm getting at is maybe there's something to a 23 year old dating a 17 year old, it's probably something noth never imagined they would go for, but because of the (hopefully) incredible connection and commonalities and overall enjoyment of each others company it makes all the sense in the world. Some 17 year olds have full time jobs, work ethics and are even done w/ high school. My first boyfriend was 15 and a Freshmen in High School, at the time I was 17 and a Senior. We both had enough self esteem to let go of any of the initial gossip by our peers, and after a while together our friends understood us and really respected our relationship. Six years later we are still very very close and if we were living in the same state we would probably be dating.
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At 17, I had a two year relationship with a 23 year old. Of course, it was legal where I live.
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I feel it is really a case sensitive question. Everyone is brought up differently, everyone matures at their own pace. I know 17 year olds far more mature and sophisticated than some 25 year olds - granted this may not be the norm, but neither is this scenario of age in a relationship. What I'm getting at is maybe there's something to a 23 year old dating a 17 year old, it's probably something noth never imagined they would go for, but because of the (hopefully) incredible connection and commonalities and overall enjoyment of each others company it makes all the sense in the world. Some 17 year olds have full time jobs, work ethics and are even done w/ high school. My first boyfriend was 15 and a Freshmen in High School, at the time I was 17 and a Senior. We both had enough self esteem to let go of any of the initial gossip by our peers, and after a while together our friends understood us and really respected our relationship. Six years later we are still very very close and if we were living in the same state we would probably be dating.
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Yes. I stand to reason that I am 17 and would know it's entirely possible to be in love with let alone mearly interested in a person that much older. Especially females who generally mature faster tend to find that people at that age group fit their maturity.
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No. You can't help these things.
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i'm just going to flat out answer your question, which nobody has really done. it is not out of the question for a 17 year old to be interested in or fall in love with a person who is 23, or older or younger. your age does not dictate how you will feel about a person. as far as the legality of everything, well other people have already gotten into that for you.
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You can be in love with anyone you want. Feelings aren't illegal. Actions are. If they become intimate, that is out of the question. If they are still having these feelings after the 17 year old turns 18, or even better, waits a little bit- then it's worth a shot. Until then... no go.
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Ha! This is exactly the ages of my bf and I. It's not weird or out of the question at all. The only thing in question is sex and whether we can move out together. Both of these depend from state to state. In my area, the age for having sex with a minor is 16 and moving out is 18.
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no, but it is out of the question for the 23yo to allow the relationship to progress to a physical relationship. As a general rule, if you're under 18, in the US, and you wanna play with sex, do it with folks you're own age until you're in college... It is far safer on many, MANY levels.
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I don't personally see anything wrong with it... but then again I am 17, almost 18 myself... I just don't see what the big deal is about a 6 year age difference. Just much more than that is pushing it.
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No, age is irrelevant. As long as all parties involved are freely consenting adults, anything goes : P
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It is out, end of discussion.
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Not in the UK!
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Definately not. You can fall in love with anyone as long as you think they are the right person. You are almost 18 years old so it shouldn't matter. Try it out and see what goes down.
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The 17 year old is not of legal age. 18 is the legal age of consent. If the 23 year old seduces the 17 year old the parents of the 17 year old can charge the older person with rape. Certainly either of you or both, can fall in love, but love immediately becomes sex...and I am sure thats what you have in mind. Wait until someone turns 18 and then it's legal and no one can be charged with Rape or spend their 24th birthday in jail.
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Of it's not the out of the question. Age is no matter when it comes too love. Anyone can love anyone, no matter the age difference. Love is cheeky like that :) +5
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No, when I was 17 I fell in love with a 24 year old man. I've liked older men, all my life!
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Nah age is only a number...there is not too much of an age difference there for anyone to yell "DON'T DO IT"
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I don't see why it would be out of the question.
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OMG, not at all! I was 17 when I fell in love with the love of my life, who was 23 (sadly, it didn't work out). It's up to you to find out if such an age difference is legal in your state. And on a personal level, you need to think about the sustainability of a relationship in which two people are at different life stages.
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I wouldnt think so...I was 18 when I fell in love with a 25 year old. He is my soul mate also...we get along great, have a great family, great life... If we met 1 year earlier, I dont think any of it would have been different. I would have still fallen in love with him. BUT... It depends on if you have fallen IN LUST...or love.. If its just an infatuation...or something REAL. Gotta know the difference first.
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Nope, not at all. When I was 15, I fell in love with a woman of 42. She was so wonderful... +5
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Nope... Not at all. I was 22yo and just graduated from collage when I met my first girlfriend who, it turns out, was 17. And SHE arranged to meet ME. A bit older and 6 years age difference means little, but at that age, if anyone were to object, the 23yo will take the brunt of the criticism.
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age matters not in love. on the other hand, age does seem to matter to those pesky judges who'll ship your partner off to jail in 18 states. you need to figure out which ones. honestly, i'd call (from a pay phone if they still exist) the district attorney's office and ask them - get them to give you the reference in the criminal code. i'd even look at it first, just to be sure. as it could be worth 2 months to 20 years of your partner's life, it might be worth it. usually it's not that severe for a first offense where the 17 1/2 year old begs the court for leniency. they'd really only (probably) get nasty if a parent got mad at the other partner ... good luck!!!
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When you look at the age differnce of six years it does not seem that bad other then the legal part . There are many 23 year olds who are developed mentally to 10 ,,,,, have the 17 year old find a nice younger person.
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It would be a good idea to find someone your age, but your pretty much grown. You will be 18 soon and everything in life from that point on is your decision so if you feel you can be happy with this guy and you know he wants you for more than whats between your legs then you should follow your heart
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