My self esteem is pretty low. I'm always asking my boyfriend if he's tired of me, etc. It's gotten to the point where he gets annoyed when I ask him that. Everything else is fine. What can I do to get some reassurance and stop once and for all?
by 
Meg
ANSWERS: 9
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You need to develop a hobby that makes you feel good about yourself - one that requires plenty of social interaction, like hiking or volunteering.
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Try to focus on doing things that make you feel good, or group activities that you can do that when you do well in them etc. that they praise you for it. When I started at college I was very scared about going back into an educational enviroment and very paranoid about handing work in but all the nice comments and constructive criticism really helped.
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You are apparently a co-dependent person. Suppose your boyfriend kept asking you, "am i good enough for you"?. how would this make you feel, if he ask you this 10 times a day? It would make you wonder if he really is good enough for you. the point being, its like the Chinese water torcher. after a while a person cracks under the pressure. Never ask this question again, ever. if you know it disturbs him, it will slowly make your relationship drift apart. Tie a ribbon on your finger to constantly remind you of the words you are never to say again, to your boyfriend.
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Leave him...before he dumps your whining ass
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well i am the same way, i stopped asking by thinking about this... if he wasn't happy with you he would tell you and dump you... i know what it's like being insecure and having low self esteem, but just think about that next time he asks, and think about the things you like yourself for, and the things he says he likes about you.. good luck
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Realize that "self" esteem is just that - it has to come from within. No one can give it to you. Asking for reassurance means that you are looking for other people to define you as being good enough, worthy, likeable, lovable, smart, etc. They can't do that for you because no matter how much they give, its never enough. And like you are now experiencing, people get tired of it, then they get tired of you. Go to the book store and buy a book on increasing one's self esteem. They all have little exercises, sometimes verbal, sometimes written, that you do to feel better and gain confidence in yourself. Should be very helpful. :) Then you can also listen to my radio interview with Sherry Argov who wrote the book WHY MEN LOVE BITCHES. I'll be interviewing her on Wed 6/11 at 7 pm PST. Find out more at the link above. Maybe you can call in and ask her about this issue... http://www.blogtalkradio.com/askheartbeat
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i also think that if he was sick of you he would dump you, i ask my boyfriend this bull crap question too. I finally stopped and realized if he doesnt like me anymore and dumps me there's a whole ocean full of more fishin waiting for me
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just stop it now...a man wants someone that is sure of herself and their love. You start believing you are not worth being someone's god gift, then they start believing it and look elsewhere. I know it sounds arrogant, I don't mean it as that. you must love yourself first, no one else really matters if you don't.
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Honestly? I would be annoyed if I was dating someone who kept asking me that, too. Stop worrying so much and just enjoy your time with him. If you're going to whine every time the two of you talk, he most likely will get tired of you.
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