ANSWERS: 14
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It's your choice. You are not married to him. You probably don't want to be anyway. Keep, abort or put up for adoption. It's ALL on you.
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You asked so here's my answer: Putting the child up for adoption would be a better solution - better for your child, better for you, better for the folks who would be given an opportunity to love your child and raise it as their own. It isn't the child's fault that his father drinks too much. It's an unfortunate situation but it doesn't warrant killing an innocent baby.
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I wouldn't worry so much about what kind of dad the biological father would be (or not be); even if he was perfect right now, that does not mean that he will be around in the future. The only person whose attachment to the child you can ever count on is you. If you think you can handle being a single parent, that's all you need to know. You might be surprised at how strong you are when the need arises. Best wishes to you and the babe.
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this a very serious subject that i feel is too important for you to take advice on AB. the decision you take will most likely affect the rest of your life. go see a cousellor NOW!
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I am thinking if you know for sure you dont wanna keep the baby that adoption is a much better option. There are millions of families who want babies but aren't able to conceive that would take great care of the child. I am PERSONALLY against abortion, but even so it is very risky. There are several things that could go wrong. And even if nothing goes wrong, there is extreme guilt and remorse afterwards, even if it doesnt kick in until years later.........And it also increases the risk for infertility if you do ever decide later that you want children. Your chances of getting pregnant then wouldnt be as good as if you hadn't had an abortion. I'm not trying to press my opinion on you. I know how hard a decision this is. I am just trying to give you all the facts I know so that maybe it would help you out. Whatever you decide, you have my support 100%!! Good Luck!!
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Just know that any decision you make will follow you FOREVER!!! I'm pro life in almost every situation, so I'm for adoption, you can even find a family now, that will pay for your medical bills and healthy food while your pregnant, then adopt the baby at birth. but no matter your decision, your next decision should be to use protection, no matter what the man says.
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You knew the father was a drinker and has put his drinking before the kids he has now and you still wanted to be with a man like this? Now your "prego" ( how I hate that word)and your not ready to be a mother. So the baby gets aborted because the father drinks and your not ready? How about adoption and let the baby live with a family who could never have a child of their own. That would be such a blessing to a childless couple.
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While I don't really condone pure advice on AB, I will address a couple of issues. First, if you really want to abort, make sure you are doing it for reasons that YOU want and not what anyone else wants and ensure that there are NO better alternatives for the life inside you. That means considering the state of the adoption system in your area and the availability of the childless locally. After that, if you decide to KEEP the baby, consider your options regarding the father, your parents, and your other support structures. You'd be surprised what a kid can live through and what kinds of great people were forged under adverse circumstances. In terms of your personal life, I recommend you highly reconsider your dealings with the father in regards to your relationship sexual and non, as well as his other family and his drinking habit.
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If he's against abortion, it's important to establish if he would mind bringing said child up himself, as a single parent OR would he leave you to do most (if not all) of the parenting? It's fine to have values, like being against abortion, but what's telling is his own attitude towards the child (currently embryo). More to the point, would you feel safe allowing him to bring up a child independently? If the answer to those questions is ''no'', he wouldn't be a single parent and you wouldn't trust him to be (over my dead body would a drunk bring up my kid), then the decision comes back to you. You are the one who'll have to carry this thing for 9 months; cope with the morning sickness, have stretch marks, have to take time off work etc. That goes even if you have it adopted. He doesn't have to go through that (lucky for him) and neither would adoptive parents. It's also worth noting he could contest and stop an adoption if he knows about it / others know he's the father and inform him what you're doing. He can't stop you having an abortion. You have to do what's right for you, and if you're not ready to have a baby, have an abortion.
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I say talk to a counselor. A women's crisis center would be able to refer you to someone. Just make sure that the center and the counselor and any clinic you go to aren't run by any religious organizations. Planned Parenthood is a good organization. They can help you make a truly informed decision. Without trying to shove anyone else's morals or ethics down your throat. Good luck!
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If in doubt.......... don't do it!
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Have the abortion. The impregnater has no right other than to let you know how he feels. If you're concerned with him becoming violent with you when you do abort, that's even more reason to abort and separate yourself from him.
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Its your choice and your body. You make your choice and you dont discuss it with anyone. If you choose to give nirth and keep it then you go talk to a lawyer to make sure you keep custody and that child support for the next 18 years in place and what kind of visitstion i.e., can the child be alone with him or over nights or in a car considering his drinking.
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i would keep it and dump the father
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