I started going to orchestra every Thursday. It was my 3rd year but it'd been a while because of Covid, and I don't know that many people. Anyway, we were in chamber groups and I was the cellist. There was me, another cellist who was playing bass, three 2nd violins and three 1st violins. I wanted to get to know these people, but once when the conductor came in, he asked if we listened to the song we were going to play yet. I said really loud, "UHHHHHHHHHH" and it was so embarrasing, beacause we actually had listened to the song before, but I had just forgot. The first chair covered and said, "yeah, we have," and another boy said, "mmm, yeah." And then after the boy gave me a really strange look and I feel so embarrased :c I might be overreacting and I definetly was a little weird and more than sensitive. From then on, the boy didn't really talk to me or anything, and he's pretty popular so he might talk bad about me. I don't know, though, because I might just be overthinking. Do you think the boy thinks I'm crazy or something? I feel so embarrased and I don't want to go to orchestra anymore. :c
Please help :c
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Yes, you're over reacting! You're not there for the approval of others. You're there to learn and grow as a cellist. Everyone makes mistakes. Its part of learning. What matters is how you overcome them. If you're a good cellist they will be impressed by your ability. If you suck then maybe they will be impressed by your tenacity and effort to improve. Regardless, what they think is not your goal or your reason for being there.
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