Tell him you want to watch it with him.

There is two things you can do: 1) you can come to deal with him looking as long as he doesnt touch.. or 2) Can get hopelessly upset when ever you catching him doing it and always be worried he is. I doubt he will ever stop, and you trying to catch him all the time is no way to have a relationship. You need trust in each other and the ability to cope with some things that will come across. If you cant, then you don't have a relationship that can be built on.

it doesn't matter if he confesses, you know he's doing it so what does it matter? If he's doing something you don't like, maybe you need to choose a different man. I'm not being krass, I'm just really serious. It must be totally frustrating for him to lie in your face when you already know the deal.

Buy a net nanny program so that it blocks the sites... or copy the history or temporary memory to another directory when you find it and show it to him as proof. Then have a serious discussion and if it means to you that much that he is fascinated with other women then he may not be the one for you. Porn addiction is difficult to break without help, help from someone else who doesn't condone it as well. If he still can't respect your wishes, you know what the next step may be. It can be that serious. Porn puts ideas into peoples heads, arouses curiosity and desires that their partner may not want to conform to, creates unrealistic expectations and degrades sex to a simple act rather than an intimate experience between actual lovers. You are not over reacting.

Don't make it into an issue, and don't fight him over it. The reason he is in denial over it is because you have expressed disagreement about it. Assuming it's "normal" porn, (nothing illegal or violent) and not obsessively eating up huge amounts of his time, then there realy is nothing wrong with it- it's normal and natural. As another person already said, it's not about having an unfulfilled relationship or wanting to have an affair. It's just a form of entertainment. It would be best if this could be a shared activity- if he finds it difficult to share this with you, that's because of his own sexual inhibitions. We all grew up in a culture that tells us "sex is dirty, sex is wrong", so he feels guilt over this. Don't compound his guilt with more guilt- be the person who does NOT make him feel guilty.

Clearly this is an important issue to you and because it is important you certainly should not sweep it under the rug or turn a blind eye. Sensitive issues like these are never comfortable to deal with, but it is important for you to address this before marriage. You suspect that your boyfriend is looking at pornography in secret. Some would find this offensive while others find it unimportant. The truth is that their opinions about its importance are irrelevant. You are hurt by it so you should say something rather than bottle it up. As for how to approach it, you can do it in several ways. You have tried asking him directly and he denies it. Maybe he's telling the truth, but I find that most of the time when a woman suspects something it is usually grounded in some truth. If he is doing it, then asking him to confess is out. A second choice is trying to catch him in the act. i don't favor this one because it will give him a lot of ammunition against you should you burst into the room and find him sending emails to his grandmother. The third option is a little sneaky, but in the end it will either confirm your suspicions or settle your mind about the issue. Go to the computer that you think he is using. Bring up a search menu and put one of these into the search window: .avi .mov .mpg These are codes for movie files. If he has them on the computer and doesn't have the computer skills to conceal them, they should just pop up. I hope that you find peace in whatever you discover. I myself am not the moral compass for the world and whether or not I agree with pornography is irrelevant. What I disagree with is dishonesty and i truly believe that if you should find your partner lying to your face,it is time to either end the relationship or have some real "come to Jesus" meetings as I call them. Good Luck

my bf does the same thing. I get frustrated and it makes me upset when I haven't gotten anything in a while, 1x in a month... and it sucks. it makes me feel that porn is better than me, its replaced me. I feel like he is looking other places for pleasing himself.i understand how you feel. its hard, its like your being replaced but worse because he is lying to you about it.

I totally understand whr u r coming from. I happened upon some porn while using my bf's comp. and i was disgusted by sum of the things i saw. And the worst thing about it was we had already had a discussion about it in the past and he told me that porn was for high skool kids with nuthin better to do and that he didnt need it because he had ME. So naturally when i saw it on his comp. i was kinda shocked and upset that he'd lied to me. And further more when he tried to blame it on his friends. And then told me it wasn't a big deal, all guys do it. I just felt like if he felt there was nuthin wrong with it, why did he lie and blame it on his friends? My main issue with some of the porn was the disgusting things the girls were doing, i kept asking myself "Is THAT what he's into?!" I just do not want to be compared to these women (if u can call them that) and i do not want him to expect certain things from me ( because he has already tried things i wasn't into and I believe this is stuff he has seen from these pornos). I have come to the conclusion that I can do nothing about it because even if he says he isn't he probably is. Ignorance is bliss: I was much happier not knowing if he was looking at it or not but since i now know I am not using his computer anymore because I don't want to see anything that will make me uncomfortable.