Okay, so maybe you do deserve a malicious answer once in a while, but you still won't get it from me. +3 is the best I can do for you right now. Sorry the downraters can't take a joke.

That would be a cruel joke to play on an unsuspecting caller. . I always say where my phone or I am located. Ask which location the caller is looking for. Then I suggest whatever helpful idea I have for the caller to get through to the right person. Then I always politely thank them for calling.

"There is no Myrtle here. We have had this phone number for two years". To which the answer usually would be "sorry for bothering you". Nothing as creative or dramatic as yours! Happy Monday! :)

Wow, how incredibly cruel. I simply say, you have the wrong number and that's it.

Ahahahaah....cruel or not that's funny!!!! ;-P I like to argue with them...because usually when you tell them that there is no "Myrtle" living there they will repeat themselves or ask if you're sure. LOL!!! I'll tell them I'm pretty sure I know everyone who is living in my house. If she is there then the b!tch better start paying rent hahahah!

Nah, all I ever say is "You have the wrong number"....Now let a telemarketer call and all bets are off....

Sorry, I am boring I say "Sorry you have the wrong number" +5

LOL. I hope Myrtle is not elderly because you will be saying that to elderly people which might bring on heart attacks! I often receive them -- I have inherited a local pharmacy's old No. It is a bit irritating, especially when you answer and they realise they have the wrong number and they just put the phone down without saying anything. Sometimes, if I'm feeling bloody-minded, I press the caller ID and dial them and tell them off, nicely. I hope.

I want you as my next door neighbour, life wouldnt be boring with you next door! +5

Now that is too funny makes me inspired to think up my own develish respones. What do you do to the telemarketers?

Nope...just " I'm sorry you have reached a number listed with the FBI, CIA, and Homeland Security...this call will be traced, and the number recorded for security purposes. Have a nice day"...you should hear the things they say WWWOOOWWW>>> +6

If they're trying to reach a party that I don't know, then I ask them what number they're trying to reach. If it's mine, then I tell them that I've had my number for about 35 years, so perhaps they were given the wrong number for that party. If they tell me a different number, then I usually tell them what number they actually reached.

Nope... I wouldn't do that to anyone. I just usually repeat the name back to them questioning, and they usually get that they have the wrong number. If not, I'll ask them what number they dialed, as I have received calls on my number that they said was the number they'd gotten, and I've had this one (cell or home) for almost 18 years. If they give me the number they dialed, it's usually off by one number, meaning they dialed transcribing one number or hit one number wrong. I don't tell them mine, but tell them which number they got wrong: "I think you dialed the 4th number wrong." Now, back when telemarketers called (back before I was on Indiana's Do Not Call list, then the National list), there were times I'd listen to the spiel, tell them I can't afford it, listen to the rebuttals, and insist that I can't afford it. (Figured I could give them a little practice on the sales talk and rebuttals.), or, in some cases, I'd just say, loudly, "NO THANKS", and hang up. I mean, I understand what you say you say is humorous, but what if it's Myrtle's mother? Her daughter? Her husband? I would not be surprised, if you continue doing this, to hear that one day, someone came to your house and vandalized it, or beat you up.

1) This could be funny in a comic book or something, but in real life, such a prank would be extremely bad taste and even dangerous. I would never do this and I hope that you would not either. Sometimes the limit between a joke and offensiveness can be very quickly crossed. I am also thinking about such pranks like they do in "candid camera". The victims are sometimes happy because they come on TV. But I am sure that there were some cases where it ended badly and they never show them. Also, they mostly know what they are doing and avoid what could really be dangerous. 2) I would never play a practical joke on someone doing a wrong number. I was sometimes annoyed in the past by people calling a wrong number repeatedly, and in such a situation, I could become a little impolite. Also, I could become somewhat impolite with insistent telemarketers. In Germany, this kind of things normally cannot happen so easily because the called person usually tells their name first of all, like "Jason Brown on the phone, who is calling?" If the person has not already hung up or if they are calling again, I ask them which number they have called or I give them my number and ask them if it was the number they were calling. This way further calls should be avoided. In some few cases, if the caller seems talkative, I could start a little chat. 3) I might have done such pranks in the past, before I understood the harm they could do, but I don't remember.

... that is very close to what I say when they ask for a guy ... when they ask for a gal, I use a line from the movie "Ruthless People" ... I say, "I'm sorry, she can't talk with my penis in her mouth. I'll have her call you back when we are through." and hang up ...

I saw the comedian Sean Locke on a panel show recently talking about this, and he says that if he gets a wrong number asking "can I talk to Mary please?" instead of saying sorry, wrong number he says "Yes, I'll just get her", then holds the phone slightly away from his face and shouts in an angry voice: "Mary! get your arse down here, NOW! there's someone on the phone!" wait a few seconds, as though listening to a reply. "I don't know who it is! probably another one of your gentlemen "friends"! get down here, now, or I'll come up there and give you another kicking!". Then go back on to the phone and in a pleasant voice say "I'm terribly sorry, she will just be a moment", then back to shouting "MARY! down here now or I'll come up there and drag you down the stairs by the hair!". Continue until you get bored, or the caller hangs up, afraid.

Some folks interact and communicate and entertain while others seek to create diversion at the expense of others. It's for you to choose who you want to spend time with. . I'm no angel - I've told lies, pulled pranks - I can be vindictive if provoked....but I don't go out of my way to humiliate and abuse and then hide behind a false claim/accusation ("you have no sense of humor"). . There are sooo many lovely people here to interact with, I find no reason to waste any of it on those who are "less than" - IMHO.

i don't pick up the phone at all if i don't know the caller id. if i do and find it a wrong caller, i just tell them they called the wrong number.

The first time, I say you have the wrong number and ask what number they are trying to reach, then if they call back I say,"yeah, hold on I will go get them", then if they are still on after a min, I come back on and say, "hold on, they were in the bathroom, here they come",and soon to see how long they will stay on, I also usually try and copy whatever nationality they are, like accent wise.

Hello there, Well, usually you won't be knowing or have an idea who is calling even if you have a caller ID or some sort of advance virtual pbx systems installed on your home or office. You have to answer the phone and from there just tell what number is he/she trying to call to verify and then just do what you can help him/her. http://www.ringcentral.ca/